Just thinking
by Nawulf
Summary: Series: 666 Satan, O Parts Hunter. This is a oneshot of Jio thinking about his relationship with Ruby. Spoilers from ch. 44 to 63. Some language.


666 Satan (O-Parts Hunter) and all the characters are (c) Kishimoto Seishi.  
Spoilers from chapters 44 to 63.

When reviewing, PLEASE, review my STORY, not the pairing in it or the way how the manga ended! Thank you!

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I used to go to the seashore every year on the same day Zero had found me. I sat on the bank and thought about all the things I lost that day. The whole Rock Bird city crumbled and fell down from the sky bringing me and all the others down with it. Luckily there was a sea below us where we fell and I survived with just a few bruises, cuts and a broken rib. More than my physical injuries I felt pain from my failure to save her... Ruby. Ah, how it squeezed my heart to think how she was lost because of my helplessness in the end. And all the others too... I wondered if any of them survived. Heh, now when I think this it's just so like not me to do such things. 

As time went by I had became a quiet and calm young man. But I had no joy in my life anymore. Still I somehow managed to keep myself sane. My days were filled with training and helping the villagers. Yes, I got a new home with them. I was always sad and quiet but they kept me moving and doing all sorts of things that took my mind off thinking the cause of my sadness. Life just went on on its own. At least I wasn't alone - even though the loss of my old friends felt bad.

When Ball found me I thought I wasn't going with my old friends again. It would've been no use because I thought that I definitely had lost the most precious person in my world. But when Ball said that she was alive... god, it was like he was telling a cruel lie. So many years I was thinking about her, how nice it could've been with the two of us together, and how magical it would be if she was alive and I could get her back... and tell her my feelings.

But Ball wasn't lying. My whole body shivered when the realization hit me. For four years I hadn't smiled (Well, maybe sometimes -- but just little!) but after that I managed to regain parts of my old self, and get a little smile on my face again. As usual I hid my eagerness actually not knowing why. In the inside I couldn't wait to kick some ass and get Ruby back... back in my arms.

We got to the Stea's base and eliminated all the enemies. Damn, why they kept trying to stop us -- to stop me? I just wanted to get my friend back, no matter if she was an angel recipe. That was a shocking revelation to me. So I, the host of the most powerful demon, Satan, was in love with an angel. I also heard that Cross' little sister Lily was a copy made from Ruby and the Solomon's key -- the pendant she was always wearing and which was now engraved in my right palm. Years ago Satan overtook me and killed Lily. And now I don't want anything else than to get the original angel back. How funny, an interpersonal relationship drama triangle thingamajigga created just by me.

Finally we got to the chamber where Ruby was held. She was in a tank filled with somekind of fluid and her soulless body didn't know what form to take. I got really worried and nervous. Amidaba told me just to shut up and think calmly. There was only a thick glass that separated me from her. Luckily one of Stea's associates had changed his mind of this whole Kabbalah thing and taking over the world and making it to end with it. He then blasted a shot from his O-Part and broke the tank holding Ruby. Now there was one last thing left to do.

I put my left hand in the water and felt how the memories of her came back very strongly. I felt how I was pulled into my own mind and the next thing I knew I was standing infront of my soul's mirror. Behind that was Ruby's soul that I had to get back, no matter what.

Outside my real body was struggling and trying to fight back Satan's powers. Cross was ready to kill me with one hit if I was about to turn into Satan. I should've hurried in my mind but I couldn't. I proceeded calmly and determinately. I carefully made a hole in the mirror so that her sould could come through even though it didn't reflect. Four years ago I didn't understand what actually happened when Ruby appeared in my mind and pushed me through this very same mirror. I never thought her soul stayed inside me after that. She said she was absorbed by Satan and that she would protect me, but that she really had been inside me all this time!

I walked through the inner pain and hatred which were now forming stinging spikes. They cut my skin and pushed through my skin and went down to my muscles. Well, not really, but it really felt as if it was real. Then I saw a little glowing orb floating above a spiked throne. Could it be -- Ruby?! I went to her and couldn't help to shed few tears. Poor Ruby, here inside me all alone, holding back Satan for me. Please, come back with me this time, please. We can hold the demon back even if you're not here -- we can hold it back from the real world too -- because then we're together!

I held her, this little softly glowing orb in my hands, brought it to my chest above my heart and told her how I finally had learnt how important friends are. Then I lift her higher and touched her with my forehead. My thoughts, her thoughts, everyone's thoughts came in rushing and gave us the strenght to get her soul out of me. Her body happily took it back and she returned to her beautiful -- now dramatically matured -- form. And I took her hand and looked into her surprised eyes, then wrapping my arms around her. My god, I was so happy I could've cried. She was so soft and warm, I could've hugged her for all eternity. I wanted to scream "Welcome back, I missed you like hell!" and squeeze her even tighter and kiss her cheeks but I couldn't. The situation demanded another kind of behavior from me -- the others were waiting for our attention too. Though I had a smile on my face it didn't feel nice to let go of her. Nu, no, don't let go off me, I wanted to hold you.

She was straight back to her old slaphappy self and even took my loinclothes to cover her naked self. Well, luckily she took my clothes and not like, say, Ball's or Kirin's. I tried to keep up with the speed of her and the others, they were now moving towards again, going for our mission even though just a minute ago I re-inserted her soul into her body! Our ship had fallen upside-down and surprisingly she used her angel powers to turn it back right way. She really was awesome.

She dressed herself and came to the bridge. I couldn't help to blush. She was gorgeous. But I was starting to feel uneasy again. Years ago I could be near her because I acted as her bodyguard. But now she seemed to have no need for such things. She was a grown-up woman, an angel with miraculous powers. She could now kick some ass all by herself -- there wasn't any need for me anymore. No need... for me. Really? I want to be useful to you. I want to be close to you even if for no particular reason. But I can't, my old elusive self was surfacing again.

Why I need somekind of excuse to be near her? I know what I really want, I realized it when I was running up to Icaros' chamber to save her. I want to be near her as a colleague, as a friend -- and as a lover. But not that time nor this time I was able to tell it to her. Now I'm thinking again I'm probaply not worthy enough to just bug in when she's doing something. It could reveal her what I'm really feeling and scare her off. Maybe she likes me only as a friend. She hugged me back then, but... I wasn't able to save her. And now I lost the Legendary O-Part she was searching for back then. I'm such a jerk.

I had the courage to go to her when she was sitting on the roof of the ship, watching the moon. I tried to be as neutral as I could. I talked stupid things about her pendant in my hand. She gave me a whoopass. Ugh, I think I deserved it. Then she teased me by asking if I was trying to ask her out! Like, that was really mean from her to ask things like that all of a sudden! As if I could give a proper answer to a question like that! I totally panicked and screwed up my chances -- again.

I remember how the eerie voice of Satan -- now when I know it was Satan's voice -- told me how I was destined to be alone and no one would ever love me. There were many times when I believed what he was saying. I was strongly believing his sayings just few days ago though I hadn't heard his voice for years.

But now I'm in a situation I believed I could never again be in. I know my friends are scattered around this ship and they're happy to have me back. More importantly I have HER back and now I'm watching her from the bridge's door. She stands infront of the window, next to Amidaba who's steering the ship. Kirin says we are going to fish as soon he finds the rods. I wish I could go to her, just like that, and take her hand, give a kiss to her cheek. Then we could do this mission together with the help of the others. I could tell you how much you mean to me, then we could kick ass, save the world from Zenom and Stea and then go to sleep together. I could feel you against my skin, push my face to your soft hair and snuff your sweet scent while softly stroking your side, whispering sweet little things to your ear. Nu, I feel so sentimental. Others would be surprised if I showed this side of me to them. They would laugh at me. That's the last thing I want to undergo again -- the contempt of others.

Oh, now Kirin found the equipment, I guess we're going outside. She's coming too and is heading towards this door where I'm standing in. Nu, I must keep my composure. "Hi Jio! Why are you standing there, come and get yourself a rod!" she says happily, smiling at me. My body's longing for your touch almost overcomes me when you stand there right in front of me. I can resist it. "Well, nothing, I was just thinking! Hehe! Yeah, let's choose rods for ourselves." I answer her and immeditely feeling little disappointed. I'm such a wimp, stupid, stupid jerk. What the hell is wrong with me?!

I've been granted a second chance. Two times I've lost my precious ones, both times not telling them what I really felt until it was too late. And now I'm not using this gift I've received. I got back my most precious person and still I'm unable to say it to her. All I do is to keep thinking these pink soft fluffy thoughts about her. Yes, great, there she goes already, wanting to choose the longest rod. Your silliness is so lovable.

I sigh deeply and go choose a rod for myself. Maybe I'll be able to tell it to her tonight...

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When reviewing, PLEASE, review my STORY, not the pairing in it or the way how the manga ended! Thank you! 


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